Some Humble Pie and Losing Sight

My friend Adam wrote an amazing post that was featured on the Craic main site today about Humble Pie.  It ultimately called out to “all CRAICHEADS to embrace High Standards, for each of us individually AND for our community.    As a community we should ALL be LEGIT.  We need to HELP each other by no-repping each other.  Swallow our pride.  In the infamous words of Pulp Fiction’s Marsellus Wallace, ‘fuck pride.’   Because following that we need to make room for a big ole slice of ‘humble pie’.   Humble pie may taste like shit, but it works wonders on our progress.  Let’s just try to keep it No Bread Pie.”

In addition to that, there was a post on the site about how Craic was expanding their services and how each and every one of us were going to be assigned individual coaches so that “everyone within that group to feel like they’re getting personalized service to fit their specific needs.”  Not surprisingly, I was assigned Jarrod Dizzle Davis.  Team Dizzle as my fellow Craic heads who were assigned Jarrod calls us.  As part of my goal setting process, Jarrod sent me an email digging a little deeper into what my goals are at Craic.  This opened the door for me to really think about what my true goals are.

Over these last few months since my shoulder injury, I’ve been really bummed about how it’s going to mess with my goals and progress that I’ve made since starting Crossfit.  But the truth is, I’d lost sight of why I started doing Crossfit in the first place. When I first went into the free intro class with that was being coached by John, I was woefully out of shape, overweight, and scared out of my mind.  While on my way to get bagel sandwiches, I had seen the people working out there – lifting weights, running down the street, throwing medicine balls up into the air and it both frightened me and intrigued me.  After trying almost every fitness regime known to man and not being able to stick with it, I decided to give it a try.  They had a free intro class, so I really didn’t have an excuse.  I think we did sit-ups, push-ups and squats.  I could barely do a sit-up without grabbing my legs and pulling myself up, I couldn’t do a push-up, and while my form for squats was decent, I got winded fairly easily.  What a huge slap in the face with how out of shape I had become since graduating college.  I left feeling a bit angry with myself on what I had let myself become and vowed to gain ownership of my body back and get back into fighting shape.  That night I emailed the introductory session coach, Jarrod, and signed up for the two-weeks on-ramp class.

Got my ass kicked at the ramp up class, but Craic kept me wanting to come back for more.  I finally found a fitness regime that I could keep going with.  Then I started doing OLY lifting and it was immensely gratifying.  I found that I could lift a decent amount.  I still struggled with my metcon, couldn’t do a pull-up, scaled all things gymnastics … but lifting was something that I could do.  I started to become obsessed with lifting heavy.  That became my goal.  We have a board up at Craic with the top 5 ladies listed at various workouts, lifts, movements and I wanted nothing more than to be on the board.  Got really close a couple of times, but I’m just not there yet.  I took private lessons with Jarrod to work on my lifting technique, so some more gains.  Closer to my goal!

And then I aggravated my shoulder, which has been a problem for me for over 10 years and I couldn’t even do a snatch or a jerk or a press.  What was I supposed to do?  There goes all my progress, right?  How was I going to reach my goal?  I emailed John and Jarrod incessantly on how I was supposed to scale workouts.  I mean, what’s the point if I can’t lift?  Poof.  There go my goals.  Why keep going if I’m not going to meet my goals? I didn’t care about the fact that 8 months ago  I couldn’t do push-ups on the ground (well, that was until I was challenged by Jarrod to improve my form – ahem…humble pie), front squat 165#, or do sit-ups without grabbing my legs.   And then it all hit me.  I lost sight of my goals.  My original goals were not to get onto the board and lift heavier than everyone else.  Those were just keeping me in my comfort zone and aiding in avoidance of my original goal.  The reason why I started Crossfit in the first place:  To gain ownership of my body and get back into fighting shape. And I lost focus of that.  I still have weight loss goals, I still want to be in the best shape of my life.  Have I achieved that yet?  No.  And it’s time to re-focus my efforts towards my original goals.  Some day, my goals will change.  I’ll get closer to where I want to be with my body and perhaps I’ll re-focus on lifting, maybe I’ll compete in the Masters in 5 years.  But that’s not for what I need to focus on now.

You know the funny part?  Because of the shoulder issues, I had to focus on other things like rowing, air dyning, etc. (running has been tricky because of my ankle).  And that’s when I actually got onto the board.  No, it wasn’t for my clean and jerk or my snatch – it was for my 500m row.  As mentioned in a previous post, Jarrod even called me a ninja afterwards, because I came out of no where and got up on the board.  I even surprised myself. I’m just getting started, which makes me think that leaving my comfort zone and eating some humble pie might also offer some additional surprises.

comfortZonw


One comment

  1. Pingback: Training 12/13/12 | Colonial CrossFit - CrossFit Ft Lee | Gyms Chesterfield VA


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