Losing Momentum and Living in the Present

Went to the gym, first time going back in since Saturday with Ann at Crossfit Heat in Dallas.  When the alarm went off this morning – I did not want to go in and workout.  John programmed a long-ass workout and it looked like a terrible way to start getting back into the swing of things.  And I thought to myself –  that even if I started back up today – I’d probably lose any momentum I had by the time I left the following Monday for SF.  But for some reason, I knew that if I didn’t get out of bed and get myself to the gym – I’d end up finding a way to justify not working out even easier the next time, and the time after that, and then before you know it – I wouldn’t be working out any more. It’s a slippery slope and I recognize that.  Got ready (despite my cat, Hobo’s best efforts at being super cute and cuddly this morning)  got into Craic and John was coaching. They seem to be mixing up the coaches / classes lately, and I’m kind of digging it.  I think it’s a good disruptor and it’s a good way to get different perspectives from the different coaches.  Jarrod, Sarah, Glen, Pete, and John have all given me little tips and tricks over the past year that have definitely helped me.

brotip

The aforementioned “long-ass workout” was:

10 min AMRAP:

  • 10 single arm dumbell snatch (5 L +5R)
  • 10 box jumps
  • 10 situps

rest 3 minutes

10 min amrap:

  • 20 single arm dumbell snatch (10l + 10r)
  • 20 box jumps
  • 20 situps

Talked to John and we decided that I would substitute clean and shoulder to overhead with the snatches.  I used a 25# dumb bell   – and as with 13.2 – goal was to go at a good pace and to keep moving.  Score for the first AMRAP was 6+1 and then score for the second AMRAP was 2+43.  The two movement clean / shoulder to overhead slowed me down a bit, but tried to stay consistent.  Great workout and was definitely breathing heavy.  The 23 minutes it took for the entire workout seemed to fly by.  Totally exhausted at the end, but really glad I got a good sweat on and glad that I went in.

Shortly after I got back from Craic, I got a simple text from Jarrod that said “You make it into the gym today?”  I’m not 100% sure why he sent the text, but I think I have a good idea as to why he did.  I have to admit, it’s been a really frustrating couple of months.  And I think it’s been obvious to people, namely, Jarrod.  It’s been hard to stay motivated and getting my ass to the gym consistently.  I’m feeling the consequences of this.  My jeans are fitting a bit tighter (although I think that this might be a bit in my head and/or my quads are getting bigger because of all the leg work I’ve been doing…), I haven’t been sleeping as well, I’m sluggish…the list continues.  Injuries aside, I’ve been sick a decent amount of these first three months of 2013 and traveling on a frequent, but irregular schedule.   I’m really off my stride here.  Every time I feel like I’ve gotten some momentum, a last minute business trip pops up or I get sick (or both!)  It’s throwing me off and I have started to feel really unmotivated.  I’m sorry I’m a Debbie Downer in this post, but I promised when I started this blog – I would be really honest about where I am.  And I’m not in the best place right now.  I’m getting overwhelmed with the thought that I have to get on a plane and travel AGAIN to San Francisco on business.  While I have plans to get into Lalanne Crossfit (it’s right next door to my hotel), traveling tends to really take the wind out of me and inevitably, I end up eating like shit (despite my best intentions).

If I hadn’t gotten out of bed and gone to the gym, I would have embarrassingly had to reply to Jarrod a simple “No.”  I really had no excuse.  I’m not sick, I’m not traveling, the snow is not precluding me from getting into the gym, I can modify the workout…It’s really time for me to stop worrying about what has happened (“I’m still recovering from being sick last week”) or what may happen (“I’m going to lose momentum anyway when I go to SF, so why go in?”) and work hard today so that I can be ready for anything tomorrow.  Over thinking about things past and future has always been my downfall and oddly, this crazy Crossfit journey is helping me confront that.

“With the past, I have nothing to do; nor with the future. I live now.”  ~Ralph Waldo Emerson


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